Of course at first, I thought it was joke. It immediately brought to mind the Lifetime movie, I Me Wed.
Oh man. Where to start on this? I wholeheartedly support the idea of celebrating being happy with who you are as a single person and not requiring someone else to make your life feel complete. But I don't think that is really what this woman is doing.
Perhaps she just wanted to do something outlandish to get on the news. But what this "wedding" says to me is that she isn't a complete person without a wedding. She needed to have the experience of getting engaged, buying a dress, getting wedding presents, having a ceremony, throwing the bouquet and having a reception. She wants to have the experience of being married without getting married. It just doesn't make any sense. It also says to me that she doesn't really understand marriage. And it feels a little disrespectful.
If she really wanted to have a ceremony to affirm herself and say that she could be happy without a husband, that's great. Have a party! Go all out if you want. Invite guests and accept their gifts. But don't call it a wedding, because it's not. And don't call it a marriage, because it's not a marriage. Call it what it is - being a complete person without being married.
I suppose I shouldn't be surprised. Our generation is very narcissistic. We take selfies and post mundane updates about our lives that we expect to fascinate everyone. Our outlook on life is extremely selfish. We expect everyone to hang on every word of our blogs . . . . ahem.
Although the movie I Me Wed is incredibly lame, (yes, I've seen it. Don't judge.), the thing that I liked about it is that when the main character is walking down the aisle in a wedding gown, she realizes that this whole thing has turned into a farce. Her original idea was just to affirm herself and who she was as a person, but then it spiralled into this huge over-the-top wedding thing. Of course she also ends up getting the guy in the end . . . . . so thanks for the Hollywood ending there.
This woman is not the only one marrying herself. Self-marriage, also known as sologamy, even has a Wikipedia entry. A quick google search will turn up Nadine Schweigert, a woman who married herself in 2012 to celebrate how far she had come six years after her divorce.
Here is a clip of Nadine Schweigert talking to Anderson Cooper about her decision to marry herself.
It's great that she wants to stand up for herself and celebrate who she is. But nothing about that says - have a wedding!
This isn't just limited to females. Kevin Nadal married himself in 2005. According to the article I read, he was gushing about his wedding gifts and how everyone said it was the best wedding they'd ever attended. He said he was trying to stage an event to celebrate being single and also highlight the discrimination against singles.
Weddings are not discrimination against singles, sheesh. Couples are not being selfish by hogging marriage. It's almost like these people are saying, hah, I can have a wedding too. Nah nah nah nah.
I'm not making fun of these people or put them down. Reading these articles made me feel sad for them because I think they are missing the point. It's hard to be left out of this "rite of passage." It's hard to be the one who hasn't had a wedding or isn't married and having babies. And it's great to celebrate being single instead of feeling like it's a curse.
But I want to celebrate being single for what it is, not what it isn't.